-Levels of Friendship.

This seems to be a reoccurring topic this week....or these past couple of weeks. How do you know if your friends are truly on your side? If they truly have your back? If they are truly on your team?

How do we weed our true friends from the so-called friends? Should we constantly be questioning others' motives? How can we truly form relationships if we do this?

I do believe there are different levels of friendship. Some friends are in it for the long run. Those are the ones that stand by you through the good and the bad and the in between. They are the ones that you would share your deepest secrets with - and they are the smallest number of your friends. Their motives are pure. They have your back, no matter what. 

Then there are those friends that are not in it for the long run but for only a season....for whatever the reason. They come into your life for a period of time and then, they leave. For some, these friends can be hard to let go.....fear of losing a friend...and the hurt that could follow. But when we realize we are going in different directions and agree to go our separate ways, we grow. 

Then there are those acquaintances, those people we don't share much of our {personal} lives with.....

Different levels of friendships. Different levels of relationships. When things go wrong, we question motives. We question if that person was ever really there for us. When friends grow apart, we feel a sense of loss. 

We cannot go around questioning everyone's motives....we cannot ask what their "angle is" either. Relationships are about trust, no matter what level of friendship it might be. 

With this comes all sorts of emotions, feelings, sometimes hurt, sometimes happiness.

We have to learn to let go of those friends who may be toxic to us. Hold on to the ones that are dear to us.

If I call you my friend, I've got your back - unconditionally. No. Matter. What. I am there. Just call on me. No questions asked.

...True Friendship.

I'd like to start by saying this: True Friendship - and when I say "true," I mean "true," is a rare gem, something that doesn't come often in life.

On one hand nearly, I can count the number of people - outside of my family - that I consider a true friend. Someone I can go to at any time, someone I completely trust with whatever I say. Someone that is there to laugh with me and to cry with me. Someone that continues to stand in my corner....and cheer me on....even when I don't feel like going on. Someone that doesn't tell me what I WANT to hear but what I NEED to hear. Someone who I would trust with my life......there for each other....always no matter what.

Those friends, those real friends, are so hard to find. I love those friends that "get me." They know who I am and what I am thinking, sometimes even before I do. And when you are uncertain of something in that friendship, to be able to talk it out....and make sure each other is okay and on the same page, without being afraid of hurting each others' feelings. Yeah. That's real friendship. 

I am thankful for each of you. Honestly, I don't know what I'd do without you.

Are They Really?

....Sometimes....you may think people are your friends, but they really are not. Not everyone is sincere in their words and actions. Look closely....are they really sincere? You be the judge.

Not everyone's motives and intentions are honest. They may cover it all up with the right words and actions....but it's just a game.

Too many people playing games with each other creates unnecessary hurt and drama and loss of trust. Friendships are taken too lightly.

I put walls up for a long time, as I was tired of the hurt. Tired of the pain. Tired of all the issues that go with any sort of relationship.

Then, I "grew up", moved on, thought I'd try this whole trusting people and friends again. But people have their own motives, their own agendas and can be incredibly manipulative. And for someone like me, who always finds the good in everyone, who trusts and gives too much, it just doesn't seem to work. Maybe I am still a bit naive.

I think I prefer the "walls up" version...so I am putting them back up. Most are going to have to get out. I should have never let some of you in, close to me. Too much hurt. Too much heartache. Not worth either of it. Keeping my true friends close........

Look closely....Listen Closely. You will see who is truly on your team, who truly cares for you, who will truly be there with you. Don't put the blinders on like I have done. Keep your eyes open.

Learning from life's mistakes. Loving myself first.